Bird’s Thoughts on Nipple Shirts and Lust

Yesterday, I really got caught up on a lot of reading…You people have been busy, busy writing, and some of it was just

Please don’t show me your nipples.

awesome. One guy went on  little rant about how women dress provocatively and then get mad at guys for leering at them, and made the suggestion that women dress modestly if they didn’t want to be lusted after. Another guy, this one a Christian, gave us women a little wisdom about dressing in a Christian manner in order to not cause men to stumble. And then my best little internet friend Sara, who has been struggling with her decision to find a female therapist mentioned that her male therapist wears nipple shirts. My head just about fell off, because I truly hate to see a guy’s nipples through his shirt. No, it definitely does not turn me on; in fact, I avoid the experience of communicating with men that seem to do this sort of thing on purpose. I don’t know if that makes me a nipple-phobe or what, but there it is…

Sara and I have decided that our code word for “gross” is “nipple shirts”. It is a very perfect code for me. I simply can’t stand it.

But instead of writing a fluff piece about nipple shirts…and I downloaded a plethora of examples, “nipple shirting” my way through the whole research assignment, I thought I’d share something about lust.

Thank God, my kids never gave me a problem with trying to dress provocatively when they were in school. I’ve had to get on to Caitlyn once or twice for the Goth look, but never once have I had to tell my girls to cover up. They just seemed to have born with the same modest gene their mother got.

That being said, it is foolish to think that men don’t look at women who are modestly dressed and still lust after them. All the blame does not lay in the women’s corner. And I know this from first hand experience…remember, I hang with men’s men on a regular basis. It isn’t always the “skankily” dressed women that draw the attention of the men. Sometimes, it is just the opposite, and comments will be made about a woman in regular jeans, regular t-shirt, and a fresh, clean face. Men will be men, and I think the clothes are a very, minute part of it.

I also think that God created men as visual creatures, and to a lesser degree, women, too. I have no problems noticing when a man is very attractive. I have the kind of relationship with my husband that I can say, “Whoa. Nice looking man.” and he can say the same about a woman to me. The difference is that I don’t fantasize about being in bed with these men, nor do I go out of my way to be “noticed” by him. In fact, people who know me will attest that I like to fade in the background…Don’t notice me, please. Especially in crowds. Lust comes into play when you are doing dirty things in your mind with that person, and if you are doing that, it is time to get on your knees and start working some stuff out with your Maker. But every little look isn’t a sin. If it was, why even leave your home ever? The world is full of beautiful people, and I can appreciate what God designed. I’ve noticed over the years that it seems to be men who are plagued by lustful thoughts that get worked up about how women dress. Sorry. Sometimes you have to address that problem inside of yourself…being in America, it is always going to be all around you. And Jesus can fix that thing about you without changing your environment…Or maybe He’ll give you an island so you don’t have to deal with it. Whatever He needs to do, He’ll do it, if you ask Him to.

Because of Chef, I’m surrounded by “bad’ boys, wearing motorcycle club patches. Some of them are scruffy looking, but some of them are simply beautiful to behold. The new trend of mc’s these days seems to be drawing professionals into the fold, and there are some clean-cut, handsome men around all the time. Of course, none of them hold a candle to my Chef, but they do try to give him a run for his money. Do I fantasize about any of them? Nope. They are handsome guys…that’s it. And with those handsome guys, come beautiful women. This is not the place to be if you are grappling with the sin of lust. Thankfully, probably in a large part due to my childhood, that isn’t one of the sins that plague  me. Which I think is why God has me where I am. He does not lead us into temptation. Should I insist that these men leave the club or dress differently because I might have a problem? No. Look to yourself, guys.

So, getting back to Sara’s nipple shirt problem, here’s a picture of what I now think Sara’s therapist looks like when he’s conducting her counseling:

Sara’s Therapist? Gross!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And a few pictures of nipple grossness for Sara’s enjoyment!!

70 responses to “Bird’s Thoughts on Nipple Shirts and Lust

  1. I can totally agree to this, at least in the perspective of women. We were sitting down with some young women and trying to figure out why they were wearing low-cut shirts. We figure it has to do with something with their past otherwise, they wouldn’t be crying out for attention. We eventually found that they have gone through traumatic stuff, but who was showing them how to dress properly?
    As for the guys, I agree with you, if you don’t want to be lusting after women in this culture, you need to get working with God on it. Not just guys but women too.
    I live in an area where people prostitution is on every street corner, so it’s something we have to live with but make a decision with how we see people. Is it really you that’s at fault or them? Perhaps both…

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    • Yes, I know what you mean about it being a problem for both sexes. I am writing only in direct answer to the rants about how it is women’s fault men fall. I don’t agree with that. On the other side, if young girls are dressing provocatively on purpose, you might start with looking at dear old Dad. A father that has a subtle “women are for men’s pleasure” attitude tends to raise daughters who pick up on that. I have found NO instances where a girl with a good, honorable father who has a healthy respect for women has a hoochie daughter. None!

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      • Yeah, I agree. My step-dad was like that. It took him a long time to get him to understand that it wasn’t the lifestyle I wanted to lead and that there were other ways to attract a man without showing parts of my unnecessarily. Even though he is very traditional, but dressing modestly wasn’t one of them.
        I think the father figure is just a small portion of it, the mother also plays a huge role in how they pick their clothing and showing they can be beautiful without showing everything. (Even God told us in the Bible that our bodies are meant to be for our husband and no one else).

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        • I’m sure moms have something to do with it, but in the families that this seems to be a big thing in, the girls tend to look to the father to determine how to proceed with interacting with the opposite gender, while boys tend to develop their opinion of what is important in a woman from their mom. I think Dads have to take the majority of the blame for the daughters, and the mothers for the opinion the sons have of women. Of course, there are going to be exceptions..people are too complicated to pidgeon-hole into one or two categories, but that is my take on the situation. :-)

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        • Join in!! I don’t expect everyone to always agree with me! I haven’t figured everything in the world out yet…I’m trying, but the universe keeps throwing curve balls at me!! And I’m way more thick-skinned than that, Katharine! Lay it on me, Girl!!

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          • Well.
            I was thinking how this might be why God said His women should be keepers at home . . .
            I know it’s a very unpopular fact, but it is fact. One command for His women that I actually love, cherish. Saves me so much nipplegazing. Etc.

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            • Yes, I’ve heard that argument before. But then, He has women who were judges, prophetesses, and some traveled with Him as He was ministering. What about those women?

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                • Not really sure what that meant…lol. Sometimes I am woefully lacking in interpretation. I think women are the keeper of the home. For instance, I keep our home clean, the bills paid, groceries in it, plus I’m Chef’s sounding board about work, and the spiritual adviser for my kids. But, we don’t make a lot of money, so I am looking for a job so we can pay the bills. When I work, I’m still the keeper of the home. And Chef is still responsible for the financial and spiritual maintenance of said home. Does that make sense? I don’t see how God was instructing women to stay home 24/7 so people won’t lust after them. I hope that came across clear…

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    • lol! Men will be men, no matter how you are dressed!! But I think it is funny too when a hoochie-dressed girl gets all indignant…What is the purpose for dressing like that if it wasn’t for guys to get all hot???

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  2. Well, for me, it is how pretty the ladies face is, not how she dresses. I don’t lust for any woman, except my wife.
    That said it works the other way also. I am particularly well built for a male. My upper body strength is hard to hide, so I wear over sized shirts to cover up my arms. When I wear a shirt that is the right size it brings all kinds of longing looks. I said longing not lust, I really don’t think anyone other than my wife lusts for me, but it makes me feel uncomfortable. I would rather be low key. I don’t want the attention.

    On a personal bases I think anyone who flaunts what they have is just asking for trouble, but that is me.

    Have a great day! Walk daily with God at your side!

    Ed

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  3. Recently I was in WalMart and two young women, one pushing a cart and the other one SITTING in the cart, were in front of me. They might have been late teens. The one sitting with her knees up in the cart was exposing most all of her line of demarcation. In a friendly tone I mentioned that she might catch a cold with so much of her backside showing. She was obviously embarrassed and thanked me and hitched up her jeans immediately. She said she had no idea she was showing it all, but I had to wonder why the friend pushing the cart didn’t tell her.
    Sometimes the result is pleasant and sometimes you can flipped off.

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    • I get flipped off a lot!! Still, the mother in me can’t help it. Some of the kids of the motorcycle club members cover themselves up when they see Aunt Bird coming…lol!

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  4. LOL!!! Loved the images. They cracked me up. And I definitely do find the whole concept repulsive. Personally, I’ve only worn a few pieces that might be considered immodest, and usually I don’t make it pass my house door dressed in them. I remember I went to the shop back home (in Guyana, where I lived, its one of those community feeling where everyone knows every one) and I was wearing my favourite short pants-they cover half of my thighs, and of course my mother flipped out. :-D but generally, I prefer to be dressed decently, since men/boys take you more seriously, as well as understand that yoi come from a good family. They approach you with respect, instead of calling out, “yo shortie!! Let’s meet my bed” or some other crap. Its a 2 way street, but a little bit of modesty usually doesn’t hurt. Plus, it feels uncomfortable parading yourself for the world to see, unless you’ve got psychological issues which make you portray that image. Though, I must admit, its not always the clothes, but your body language, your eyes, your mouth. They all tell a story. A woman can be dressed in a burqa and just one suggestive glance can cause a puddle of lust for some weak guy. Its all in the mindset, after all modesty varies according to culture. But number one point is……..boooooo nipple shirts!!!! :-D

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    • lol…Boo Nipple shirts is right! And I agree about the mind set thing too. A woman on the prowl is going to get noticed, no question about that. I just find blaming women for the whole enchilada is kind of unfair too. Frankly, I just want people to be fair about what it takes to cause people to stumble, and I find men can be equally responsible, despite what they may accuse us of. I’ve never liked wearing shorts period. I have the whitest skin..Chef says I’m pink, not white…Yuck! I’m a jeans and t-shirt kind of girl, myself!

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  5. what if us women went around showing just our nipples through our shirts???? ya, it grosses me out to, love the phrase, nipple shirts, i won’t forget this one!!

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  6. Nuts! Most likely will not sleep for a week now, thanks a lot!

    If you got it flaunt it, too many moral police in this world anyway, no one says you have to look, not in my house!

    Pick one … I am gonna keep staring …. and of course … enjoying.

    Thanks girls.

    DS

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    • Well, Don, no one can say you aren’t a 100% honest, now can they??!! I’m going to content myself with thought that from this moment on, you will never see a guy’s nipples again without thinking of me… :)

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  7. A guys nipples?

    Nooooooooooooooo Way!

    I was talking about appreciating the female form. I am strictly boy-girl-boy-girl ….

    We were in Florida not long ago, and this couple, a nice shapely couple came down the beach. She was wearing a dental floss bikini and he had on a speedo.

    Both of them, believe it or not, fit good.

    So I am looking and all of a sudden he gets all bent out of shape and barks at me … “You staring at MY wife?”

    And I smile, place my hand on my hips and reply … “No way Sailor, I am staring at your little surprise you are advertising there sporty, I don’ t need her.”

    He just acted kind of embarrassed and then they walked away. I mean Jeeze Louise, you don’t want ‘em looking, wrap ‘em up.

    Nope no male nip’s for this kid … no sir.

    DS

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    • Don! I am laughing my butt off!! Good come-back!! I agree..if you don’t want people looking, don’t advertise…but still..I don’t know many men that would have gone that far…You are too funny!!!

      But you’ll see a man’s nip…you live in America..AND Oklahoma…LOL!!

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  8. Totally love this post! And I agree, clean clothes and a fresh clean face is sometimes all it takes to get noticed–especially with a great smile that lights up your whole being.

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  9. I am back, I saw this post before Stephanie and I left for our trip yesterday but did not have time to respond. It is sad the state the world is in…

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  10. Thank you! Women are not 100% responsible for the problem of oggling. I don’t dress with my breasts hanging out but suddenly I’m the jerk for addressing the issue? Sorry, buddy. Look to yourself. I’m responsible for how I dress, not my form.

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  13. Interesting post and I came about a very roundabout way referred from another blogger. Never heard of Nipple shirts for men so the picture helped. I wonder if the psychologist knows his nipples are visible. I know for me that I am very warm blooded and sweaters I can’t wear even in the winter. Most buildings are heated and not certain where that guy lives but he may not want to be uncomfortable all day wearing a shirt under another shirt.
    Where does all this judgement come from? You are right about one thing. Guys will be guys and they are hard-wired to be visual and how much more than women I have no idea.
    If a woman doesn’t want her cleavage noticed or her legs looked at, then cover up but that said I believe guys mostly notice and don’t stare. Not the ones with brains and class anyway.
    I like to wear white shirts. They go with everything, and look classy, and I like to wear black shirts also. I also think women need to realize that less expensive shirts of white cotton are thin and while nice and cool in the summer they can be transparent I suppose if they are tight.
    I wonder if this lady is willing to let this guy know about his nipple shirt – if it was a girl would she tell him?
    I realize we all have opinions and it was interesting to give my point. Thanks. Kudo’s for having a blog where there is discussion.

    “If someone isn’t what others want them to be, the others become angry. Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.”
    ― Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

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    • lol…The Nipple Shirt conversation just keeps on going! I understand completely that it can be accidental. But, just like we would tell a woman if her nipples were showing, I’m the same way about a man. No one wants to see that. Find a different kind of shirt. I’m not made of money, but my husband, who is hot-natured as well, wears shirts that don’t show his nipples. Where there is a will, there is way!

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